The Factory: Break in Part 1 of 2
Ad a message on me cell phone...said...we need u (me) at the factory NOW. There's been a break in!! Soooo I dashed 2 the factory in Pearl...name of me 3 wheeled Robin Reliant...taz 3 wheels soooo less drag c. Got there in a flick of a lambs tail...well no...it was me car actually :). Woz met by Cliff, pig who makes them erm...er...marvelous mugs...As i walk thru the erm..er..bits on the floor i oinky shouts 'Wots so important i have 2 come in on me day orf ?'...shaking crunchy bits of pottery off me trotters...
---I thought u shud c this ... one of me workers says (points 2 mess on floor)& shows me all smashed mugs in kiln...that a big hot oven we bake the mugs in...but i've managed 2 avoid getting in...so far :)
---ooOOoo wot a mess oinks I....then Clarice comes trotting over 2 me...blubbering & wiping her snotty snout with tissues (wot matter with back of leg? It wud save on the tissues!!) She manages 2 show me her latest design book all covered with paint of different hues (looked alright 2 me but...) Its all wrong its all wrong sniffs Clarice, someone has spoilt all my designs....& with that she falls 2 the floor in heap FLUMP! (like that! ) oinking & sobbing like theres no 2moro.
---ooOOoo erm better have a mug of T, wheres Buttercup ?? Oh! She crying in corner as her T-trolley has been...been BENT all outta shape & the wheels r missing!
---Hall & Mark run 2 me trotters all up in air...squealing...someone has wrote all over these last years calenders!!...
---Woz this ? i say as Spode & Bezwik show me their broken pottery....Shaun & Shirley shows me wot WOS supposed t b T-cosies...woz all cut up. Then Ziggy & Parsnip shows me the mess all over part of their factory floor where the chocolate covered raisins ad been chucked all over round & about then stamped on...flat!
--- Oh dear...this will never do oinks i...& that just about did it!!
Policepigstable came & wrote down a few notes (doh,ray,far,me etc.) & oinked has anyone got anything against u ?
---Looked round & as i cud c no 1 against me...stayed speechless like, & shrugged me shoulders.
---Have u in inadvertently offended anyone recently or has a grudge against you?
Cudnt c grudge (who ever grudge was ?? )
---Erm er well...i az employed new erm er staff erm er cud only take on 2 sheep, 2 goats & a cow....but u shud of seen the crowd that turned up 4 so few jobs!! Ad 2 turn most of them away :(
---ooOOoo wot a mess oinks I....then Clarice comes trotting over 2 me...blubbering & wiping her snotty snout with tissues (wot matter with back of leg? It wud save on the tissues!!) She manages 2 show me her latest design book all covered with paint of different hues (looked alright 2 me but...) Its all wrong its all wrong sniffs Clarice, someone has spoilt all my designs....& with that she falls 2 the floor in heap FLUMP! (like that! ) oinking & sobbing like theres no 2moro.
---ooOOoo erm better have a mug of T, wheres Buttercup ?? Oh! She crying in corner as her T-trolley has been...been BENT all outta shape & the wheels r missing!
---Hall & Mark run 2 me trotters all up in air...squealing...someone has wrote all over these last years calenders!!...
---Woz this ? i say as Spode & Bezwik show me their broken pottery....Shaun & Shirley shows me wot WOS supposed t b T-cosies...woz all cut up. Then Ziggy & Parsnip shows me the mess all over part of their factory floor where the chocolate covered raisins ad been chucked all over round & about then stamped on...flat!
--- Oh dear...this will never do oinks i...& that just about did it!!
Policepigstable came & wrote down a few notes (doh,ray,far,me etc.) & oinked has anyone got anything against u ?
---Looked round & as i cud c no 1 against me...stayed speechless like, & shrugged me shoulders.
---Have u in inadvertently offended anyone recently or has a grudge against you?
Cudnt c grudge (who ever grudge was ?? )
---Erm er well...i az employed new erm er staff erm er cud only take on 2 sheep, 2 goats & a cow....but u shud of seen the crowd that turned up 4 so few jobs!! Ad 2 turn most of them away :(
----Hmmm says policepigstable...perhaps someone is paying u back 4 not hiring them ?
----No, no 1's given me any money (scratches head) & i dont av any boxes 2 make any1 higher ?? (scratches butt.)
---Policepigstable looked puzzled & scratched his erm..his butt. Well i have 2 go now & type up these notes & if anything turns up....i'll get in touch...with that he got on police bike. Rrmnnnn-nnnn Rrmnnnn-nnnn (revving up of police bike noise) & off he went.
---K all trotters & hooves 2 job of clearing up!!
----No, no 1's given me any money (scratches head) & i dont av any boxes 2 make any1 higher ?? (scratches butt.)
---Policepigstable looked puzzled & scratched his erm..his butt. Well i have 2 go now & type up these notes & if anything turns up....i'll get in touch...with that he got on police bike. Rrmnnnn-nnnn Rrmnnnn-nnnn (revving up of police bike noise) & off he went.
---K all trotters & hooves 2 job of clearing up!!
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