Laptop Blues ... part 2 of 2

Part 2 of 3

HEY!

..."HEY!..(i shout)....

"ZZZzzzZZZ. Oooh! what's that ?" Shop keeper wakes up with a start. 
Hmm haz he been listening( i wonder 2 meself ).

"I'll have 2 send it away....will phone you in three days time...you have a cell phone i presume ?

"Yup i az, ears me number" (wrong earth spelling but who cares). Bye. Moonpig looks sad :(
"3 days!!!"oinks Moonpig...walks back with friend to farmhouse...Sigh! twiddle me trotters...wot shall i do now?

"Dont worry Moony you can borrow my laptop" says me friend running off 2 fetch it....Puff Puff Puff....ear you are[wrong earth word is catching] (hands over laptop).

"Ooooo thx :) Let me repay u with...er..er..dinner u will stay wont u ?"

"Sounds good to me." Dribbles !

...So as I prepare potatoes & me dear pink piggy friend watches...i gets me stanley knife...Quisssh Quisssh! (noise of ...er...stanley knife being thrown up, peeling & slicing at the same time as comes down.

Bead of blood on friends trotter

"Neat trick eh!" says I & then...opps knife slipped & pricked friends trotter & bead of blood appeared at end of trotter....oops....It was only a little nick but "oh dear"...i winked...>@^ (like that), "think it bad...we gona have 2 ham-pu-tate ur trotter."

...Well pink piggy friend sat down real hard...PLONK!...in chair & i got a plaster out me pocket & said...All fixed! & U looked relieved...sooo we did 2 bags of tatties & fried 'em in rapeseed oil.

Friend says, "I have 2 go now...look after me laptop...bye "~~~(~ = is wave).

"Will do i" shouted as friend went off down garden path & thru the gate which i understand is an intriguing device 4 getting in & out of...er..erm.things...like gardens....2 b cont..

Laptop Blues ... part 1 of 3

Part 1 of 3

Moonpig slurped down swill 4 breakfast wiped greasy lips & switched on laptop ready 4...erm...work!Click(noise of laptop b-ing switched on )....Nothing happened!...Hmm I'll try again

Blooming laptop!!!!

L8r....signal may be down...time passes....OH! still the same why wont this flipping laptop work? I'll give it a little tap...Thump! Thump! Clump! (noise of laptop getting hit by some 1's trotters :(  ...Oh dear,i feel quite faint...& hot...& dizzy....sweats profusely!

"What ever is the matter Moonpig ?" says me piggy friend.."You look quite pale, have you had a friend die?"

"Oh hi friend u cud say that," I snorted, "think laptop is poorly come on in dont stand by the door! Cant get a peep out of me laptop...have 2 take it in2 the village repair shop & c if its fixable...u want 2 come?"

Serious Rule Book! 

"Cause i'll come" says piggy friend, "i havent got much on anyway." (shrugs shoulders)

"Glad 2 hear that az pigs r not allowed 2 wear clothes...says so in me trotter book here...called animal farm iz rule number 3..c!"

Shows piggy friend me book...but quickly whips it away as i dont want me friend 2 c ALL the rules :) well not just yet. Friend looks puzzled & screws eyes up >@< ...like that.

Later....Tingle lingle ling! (noise of shop bell alerting shop keeper to our presence). 

"What can i do for yer ?" says shop keeper (whipping out a radish or 2 from his pocket & crunching it noisily)...CRUNCH!

"ERM...er...can u fix me laptop if its fixable?" (earnest look).

"Yup! What is exact problem?"

So can u fix it ?

"Well it was working K last night & when i cum 2 use eet this morning...[tears in eyes] (sniffle sniff )..sigh! I cant get a signal...cant get on the Internet &..blah blah blah drone drone...mumble mumble....so u c i just cant do without me laptop....soooo can u fix it ?" 2 b cont...