The Greedy Buzzard ... part 1 of 4

Part 1 of  4

One fine day in the month of May...or...April, Moonpig was working hard on the farm making sunflower oil in the refinery. After many months of growing sunflowers, needing 550 for each batch of oil, making 35 bottles of oil & taking 18hrs.
Moonpig thought out loud..."i'll take some 2 market 2 sell as these farmies who come 2 my farm x-pect it 4 a bargain price, like nowt, will not even cover my costs! I'll just check on me 'still', well that

Glurk! Glubble! Glurk!

aint truly x-ack word 4 it az iz bubbling away in me dis-till-harry"
...glurk! glubble! glurk! (noise of erm dis-till-harry working away).
Next when done, Moony poured oil in2 old pressure cookers, Gwullup! gwullup! Bluuopp! (noise of oil filling up pressure cookers).
"Now 2 stir,(so i gets up & moves, just a little :) ) and leave 2 cool...L8r on(time passes)...Now i just az 2 fill these bottles up i bought cheep :)  [from Ebay] wiv me oil & seal 'em...like...soooo...& pack 'em in these boxes i got even cheeper from wot local super-market chucked out...there...done. Now 2 load up Pearl, the 3-wheeler green beauty that goes like a bomb (after converting 3-wheeler 2 run on forage beet), with the sunflower oil when...

"Need any help ?" oinked me piggy friend in a little squealy voice.

Loaded up Pearl wiv  Sunflower Oil

"Hi friend come along & help me sell me sunflower oil if u want. Cud do with the 'elp I'll pay u peanuts", i said temptingly showing me friend a packet full & shaking it. Me friends eyes lit up & got in2 the car.

"I have 440 bottles of sunflower oil 4 sale & with the 10% tax i has 2 pay ermm...gets Kal-Q-later & punches numbers in & ...think i'll sell 4,.. 440pd each bottle"(thats potato dollars we use on MFF).

"Don't go to fast Moony as i...as i....want to see the scenery and i'll open up the window, just in case.

"Dont know whats up wiv u, we not doing much over 70mph ? Wots that sign say over there ?"

Can u c the pretty trees then ?

Friend uncovers eyes with trotters..."It says 40mph !" Friend covers eyes back with trotters.

"Better put on the breaks then. Errrk,errk errk ! Oh watch out 4 me sunflower oil. Push it back orf ur head dont want 2 damage eet,(seems am getting a lot better with these Earth Words :))..better now ? Is that wot u wanted ? Can u c the pretty trees?" Friend didnt answer as was trying with all might to push back the boxes of sunflower oil......2 b cont.